Salem & Gloucester

October 17, we traveled to Salem in the morning. As a child I was fascinated by the history found here. I was greatly saddened by the stories I'd read. I never understood how easily adults could believe the words of young teenagers without thinking twice about what was suggested about the character of great human beings....all out of sheer fear.
All my life I wanted to come to Salem and honor those who died because they would not lie and dishonor themselves or their own integrity by simply saying they were a witch and worshiped the devil.
When we arrived to Salem I was again disappointed to discover the commercialism found in the town. People I know had suggested I would find a "bad feeling" when I arrived. I did not find such a feeling. I found a town ... a tourist town, with little shops, cobble stone streets. There were actresses and actors selling tickets to the various shows and tours; none of which captured my attention enough.
I searched out the main museum, eager to see some artifacts and hear some of the tales, but found the cost to be ridiculous and not worth the tour (from what friends had said). So we searched out what I really wanted to see: the memorial in honor of the lives lost. This was where they were honored:

Each tablet has a name of one of the individuals that were killed. We walked around and read each name and how they each died. We found on one tablet this touching letter: 

After Salem, we traveled to Gloucester, saw the most beautiful vacation homes (EVER!) and watched the sunset and captured some beautiful images of fishing boats and my sister (thanks, Golden Hour!)....my favorites, for sure: 

Marblehead Sailboat 

Gloucester Fisherman's Memorial

Gloucester Harbor

Sandy in a beautiful light

Me :)

Where in the World Have I Been?

I am terribly behind in blogging because I have a difficult time sitting long enough to type up any entry. I have been very busy traveling and playing with Richard's kids and Chance and enjoying what I can.

But I have been in a lot of pain.

Back in March, Eric and I traveled to Virginia and on the long flight I felt a twinge in my back and left hip. My left leg hurt off-and-on for a while but was generally pretty mild. Over the months, the pain increased but I didn't think too much about it. I took Ibuprofen for a while and then began taking Aleve, which helped.

By the time we went to California in August the pain was much more notable in my left hip and leg. So much so, that Sandy helped me do some stretches on her Pilate's machine each morning. They helped relieve some of the pressure.

In late August, I mentioned the back pain to my primary care doctor and he referred me to physical therapy for hip bursitis. He was convinced it was my hip, but I was convinced it was my back. I went to physical therapy a few times but mentioned the pain to my friends and they referred me to their chiropractor.

The chiropractor began to help me for the hip bursitis but quickly agreed with me, that this was a back issue we were dealing with me and referred me to have an MRI.

I went for an MRI on Sept 28 thinking it would be no big deal. It turns out I'm a little bit whole lot claustrophobic.
When they put me in the machine, I tried to remain calm as I waited for the music to turn on, but the music never came. I tried to talk to myself into a calm place, but I could hear my heart rate and my breathing begin to pick up the pace....and then my stomach joined in the panic party.
To make matters worse, the night before the MRI, we'd been to a party and as we'd left, we'd seen a man on a bicycle be hit by a car so with my eyes closed in the machine, his face was all I could see. With my eyes forced open, all I could see was the edge of the MRI machine. This white coffin MRI machine was too close for comfort and The Crazy entered into the thoughts, "what if there's an earthquake?" "what if my vertigo starts?" "OMG, did the earth just shake a little?" ... the pit in my stomach grew two sizes.
Sane Tina tried to intervene and remind The Crazy that this tube has two openings at both ends and that I wasn't truly trapped ..... but I was shaking and breathing heavily and could feel that I was going to lose it any minute ... Once The Crazy got in the Rational side didn't stand a chance....I pushed the panic button before the scan ever even began.
I chuckled with my friends about it later that at least I never got to the place of "what if the zombie apocalypse starts while I'm in here!?" LOL!

I returned for on Oct 3, for the MRI. This time I was given a Valium. I was told it might knock me out. It didn't. But it did keep the panic at bay, for the most part.  I decided to prepare myself by giving myself several images to keep in my head's "happy place." Specifically, Lake Powell:

And, places I'd like to photograph:

I also decided to replay a dream I once had. It was one of my favorite dreams of me walking along the beach. I found beautiful sandcastles that wanted to be washed away by the water. As I complied, they left me beautiful gems: perfect emeralds, rubies, amethysts, etc.





The final thing I decided I would do if began to panic, was to count from1 to 50 and back to 1 again. That would be the ticket. :)

I arrived for the Valium an hour before the MRI and felt myself relax a bit but didn't feel too much and definitely did not konk out. The two techs were so nice helping me get into the machine and explaining the process and we went. They forgot to turn on the music again, but this time they asked me about it and I was able to tell them so the panic didn't even start up. The music was nice.

I didn't realize how loud the machine would be, however, so the music was drowned out by the BOOM, BOOM, BOOM...however, I didn't mind the rhythm of that BOOM, BOOM, BOOM. It reminded me a lot of the trance house music that I listen to when I'm running and I was able to let time pass pretty quickly. Lake Powell images helped a lot. Waterfall images were nice.

Twenty minutes passed by without much of a flinch. Then they moved me deeper into the MRI machine and my heart jumped and my stomached lurched. They were moving onto my lower back and I really had to rely on all the little tricks I'd prepared myself with. The machine got really warm....and told myself, "I'm on a beach laying out...yeah, that's the ticket. At Lake Powell and it's really hot...can't get away from it cuz, it's Lake Powell in June! Yeah! That's right!."

It wasn't much help. Heartbeat started rising.

Okay.
Um.
Waterfalls....pretty waterfalls. 
Nope?
okay.

Um.

Beach.
Waves.
Sandcastles.

Not that either?

Okay.

1...2...3..4........
41..42..43..44..43..42...
wait...which direction was I going?

I got stuck in the 40s every time.

Once in a while I'd have a little devil in my ear saying, "just open your eyes...just see how close you really are to the wall...just do it.....do it, do it...just once."   I never did.

Finally!
Finally! 45 minutes later, they told me they were done and I was being let out (as if I was in prison, or something, geez)...That's when I opened my eyes, on the way out. And I'm so glad I waited, because there wasn't more than a few inches between my nose at the machine.

The results came back a couple of days later. I have two bulging discs in my low back (L4-L5 and L5-S1). It's not uncommon for someone in my age bracket. I've been told that about 80% of 39 year olds will have this; it's part of aging, like wrinkles and gray hair, but only about 20% of the 80% will experience the pain of what I have, and most will heal completely (so there's a lot of hope for me).

Here's my actual image:

You can see the bulge putting pressure on the nerve. This is the nerve that goes to the legs and feet. It's on the left side of the nerve, so only the left leg is affected by this condition. (thank goodness)

I have since been undergoing treatment, but I will talk about that in another entry, when the pain has completely subsided.

Virginia to North Carolina and Back

March 7: Eric and I left Virginia in the early morning hours to make the drive to North Carolina, to his old stomping ground.
He spent a chunk of time living and playing in and around Havelock and Morehead City while in the Marines. He's been wanting to take a trip back for a long time and it seemed as good a time as any.

Once we arrived, he was surprised to see that base housing had been upgraded significantly from the hole he'd lived in. After touring his neighborhood and town, we drove to Atlantic Beach. It wasn't super warm, but warmer than we'd had so far on the trip, so we rolled up our pants, took off our shoes and socks, and walked along the shoreline.  It was a pretty empty beach.......just the way I like it.

We soaked in the sights and did some shopping and then drove further south to have dinner with Eric's cousin Dusty. I don't know Dusty too well (really, at all) and it was fun to talk with him and see a different side to Eric's family than what I know. Certainly, we will make another trip that direction and spend more time enjoying family and the sites.

Here are my favorite pictures, but the rest of the shots can be found on Flickr.

Why we Blog

I'm beginning to wonder why it is that we have a blog? Is it to share with an anonymous audience in hopes of gaining some fame (be it, local or within friends and/or family)?

If no one reads your blog, do you continue to blog? If you follow blogs, do you leave comments?

I'm just not sure of my purpose of blogging any more. It was to share my life with my family, but I find that many in my immediate family don't read my blog, so my reasons are close to moot.

Personally, I enjoy keeping up with my friends and family via their blogs.

This is me rambling (and doubting myself) on a Sunday evening.

Five Years Together

Yesterday, Eric and I celebrated our fifth year anniversary! CRAZY! Time flies!!

We went to the Anniversary Inn in Logan and stayed in the room: Arabian Nights. I can't say enough about how much I loved that room! It was so peaceful and calming! I loved the water fountain and the colors of the room. I think I might have to redecorate our own bedroom. LOL!

Of course, I took pictures.

Tina Likes To.....

This has been on facebook and I just haven't done it. Tyler posted it on his blog, and I'm gonna copycat his idea.

To play, Google "(your name) likes to" (in quotation marks) and report back on the first ten items.

Here's what "Tina likes to":

1. Tina likes to roll around in the dirt.

2. Tina likes to color.

3. Tina likes to put things in her mouth. (shall we leave that one alone?)

4. Tina likes to enjoy life in the moment.

5. Tina likes to dress up and make herself look as good as possible.

6. Tina likes to cleekah! (this has a link to a YouTube video)

7. Tina likes to... Move It!!! Move It!!!

8. Tina likes to put in a good 11 hours of sleep in one fell swoop. (how true it is)

9. Tina likes to be admired.

10. Tina likes to look nice and enjoys decorating her hair with sparkly clips and hair bands.

Nothing too bad...so I'll post it :D

Celebrate Good Times

So I celebrated my 35th birthday this week. It's so weird to put that age to myself. I don't feel that age, but then I don't know what 35 should feel like.

In most places (outside of Utah, of course) 35 is the prime age to be. Everybody strives for this age. I suppose it's similar to how we all feel when we reach 21 years old. We all wanted to be there.
For my birthday, Eric took me to a wonderful lunch at the Market Street Grill. The fresh Atlantic Salmon (wild, not farmed) was FANTASTIC. I forgot to take a picture of the salmon (if you really want to see one, run to the store and check out the seafood area). I did get a picture of the dessert, though. Yum.

Later in the evening, Eric and I joined Richard and his kids at my mom's house for hamburgers. I love those kids!! We had so much fun. We played in the front yard with Dante.
(Collin was sick, which made me cry)

Dante is getting a bit old, which is sad to watch. He still loves the kids, though.


Elise posed a very serious look - which I thought suited her perfectly. I thought is turned out nice.


Cute Andrew is such a poser! I love his smile and playful personality.


I loved the way this shot came out of Marcus. He was just sitting there watching me and I captured his expression.


And then there was poor Collin asleep in the car. He has to have one of the sweetest dispositions of any kid his age.

California Dreamin'

CONGRATULATIONS to April for her amazing and awesome accomplishment. She graduated from University of Southern California at Long Beach in economics. Woo - that's a mouthful.

I met Elida and Damon's cute little baby, Mason, and I fell in love instantly. He's so mellow and sweet, and he's a people watcher - so he fits right in with the rest of us.



We spent the weekend on Catalina Island. My mom, Sandy, April, Collin, Elise and I camped in Little Harbor. Elida, Damon, Mason and my dad had hotels in Avalon - a most touristy little town.
Our camp site was just off the beach of a beautiful little cove and we saw incredible sunsets and played in very soft sand of the beach. On Saturday (5/31/08) we got on a "bus" (really, it was a van) and went to Avalon to spend time with the Avalonians.
In the end, this was a most pleasant and relaxing vacation. I had a very difficult time saying my goodbyes to my sisters. I usually don't feel such emotions, but this little goodbye was felt deep in my heart and I was sad. Sometimes, more than others, I realize just how much I miss my sisters.
Flying home was very nice and comfy - of course, I love Jet Blue. I was on one of their new planes - so LOTS of room for my short and stout legs. The crew was awesome and had some cute jokes and fun little comments as we flew. It was so very nice to sleep in my own bed and most of all to see Eric (here's the cheese). I had missed him a lot and it was nice to see him. Next time we go to California, WE will go to California together.

Here are some of my favorite pictures I took while on this adventure:
First we have the Two Harbors beach - I thought the colors of all the kayaks under the palm tree was amazing.


Collin and Elise loved playing in the water and along the shore line (do you remember playing in the water all day long?). I loved this shot because you can see Collin is jumping.

I loved how pensive this shot came out, with Elise just walking along the beach.

Another really great picture of Elise walking in the water. I thought it looked great how the sun light is coming through that first wave.

The sun began to set and this shot came out very nice. I was standing by our tents and you can see we were right off the beach. Just a really nice spot.

I took a gazillion pictures of this sunset, but this one was my favorite because of one little seagull. Collin hiked up with me and we watched the colors unfold.

In Avalon, I got some other really great shots, but this one makes me laugh.

On the morning of our last day, Sandy and I woke up very early (around 6:00, which is unheard of when you're on vacation) and walked to the beach. We found this sailboat had joined us in the night. Again, the seagull made this a favorite.

Just before our bus collected us for our journey back to a civilized world, I took some pictures of the palm trees that encircled the camp ground. I love the very blue sky.

Wanna see more? see my flickr pics (link to the right). I know, a shameless plug for my pictures. Also be sure to see Sandy's pictures and when my mom gets hers loaded up, make sure you hit those, too.

You know, I was planning on where my $600 surplus would go? Yeah, well, a large chunk went to this trip and the expenses - so it guess I did was the money was intended to do, right?